Breton tops and scarvesOn a very rare night where we grabbed a couple of hours together to plan our blog, Suz and I started chatting about all the “rules” for 40 plus ladies and how mostly we ignore them all (Suzanne got VERY cross reading that she wasn’t to wear her maxi dresses anymore – ridiculous right?).

But as we chatted about how much we absolutely hate being told what we can and can’t wear, we started making a list of our own rules that we do swear by, many of which haven’t changed in the last 2 decades despite getting ‘old’. Here are ours. And of course we don’t expect you to pay attention to any of them and encourage you to wear whatever the hell you want.

Suz: ALWAYS wear matching underwear (always buy two pairs of knickers to every bra).

Nic: Own at least three pairs of great fitting, flattering jeans.

Suz: Every women’s makeup essential item – nude lipstick.

Nic: Invest in your hair with a great colour and cut from a hairdresser you trust

Both: Breton Tops; the more the better (and they aren’t just for Spring).

Nic: BIG silver hoops. Big.

Suz: Delicate jewellery with a couple of bold statement pieces.

Both: Own at least one red mac and lots of good quality coats.

Nic: Shoes. Loads of them. Can’t ever have enough.

Suz: Boots are the essential footwear.

Nic: Cross body handbag. Smallish so you can FIND STUFF.

Suz: Own 800 pairs of tights. Must have three pairs in reserve at all times.

Nic: No tights.

Suz: Oversized tote bag that DOES NOT look like a baby bag.

Nic: Best phone you can afford.

Suz: Mum on speed-dial.

Nic: Mini-break every 6 weeks.

Suz: Expensive moisturiser (Even if it doesn’t work).

Nic: Thumb ring, toe ring and nose piercing. All or any of them.

Both: Scarves. An easy and cheap way to change any outfit.

Suz: Little Black Dress.

Both: Don’t take any notice of people who tell you what you can and can’t wear because you’re a certain age or shape.

 

 

 

John Masters Shampoo, Detangler and travel setThis is not a blog about hair products but I’ve just spent £60 on the John Masters range, without so much as the flicker of an eye. I love them, so I bought them. My ever-so-calm purchasing power, got me thinking about how things (me) change. 10 years ago spending a small fortune on hair products just wouldn’t have happened. Request them for birthdays, yes, but me spend that much on a ‘treat’ for myself; absolutely not.

Throughout my 20’s I was a cheap-shop shopper. Addicted. In my 30’s, I realised the amount of money I was wasting on £5 tops and just how awful “fast fashion” really can be. So I launched a business, Daisy Green (with Suzanne), and over-compensated for my “throw-away” lifestyle buying nothing new for 12 months. Instead, I became the queen of the charity shops and clothes swaps. It was fun. I still love a good rummage in a nice charity shop; people throw away the most amazing stuff.

Recently, I was chatting with the very lovely Sharon McArthur, The Leadership Confidence Coach, who is in the business of making us more confident (check out Red Handbag). Our conversations are lively, but we always come back to the same conclusion; know yourself, love yourself, and everything else follows.

Through my bad years (about 12 of them), I didn’t like myself let alone love myself. But that time is long gone. So even though I know that happiness does not come from buying stuff, happiness does come from treating myself. I am worth it.

At the top of my “things I love to treat myself with” list are:

  1. Taking friends out. When I have money, I’d spend every penny I have on them. And what a nice feeling that is.
  2. Holidays. Weekends away. Every 6 weeks if we can. It has to be done!
  3. Looking after myself:
    1. Make up. I have nearly given up cheap brands. And swapped to more quality brands. (Still feels weird.)
    2. Hair products. Let’s face it, if your hair isn’t right, you just don’t feel good.
    3. My first great quality white shirt. A bargain in the sales from Fenwick. I’ve never paid £60 for a shirt. But it started life at £160. So, it’s a bargain. Especially when I absolutely love it.
    4. Clothes in general. I am sick of buying clothes that last 2 minutes. I always recycle the items I no longer love, but I’d much rather buy things that will last.
    5. Shoes. Shoes. And more shoes.
    6. Magazines.

Melissa Jelly ShoesAnd those feelings of guilt about spending on myself? Or taking breaks? Or enjoying my friends’ company? I used to carry enough guilt to lifetime. I’m off to the shops.

Nicola x